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| well...that was pleasant.
moving right along.
my next victim...the academy awards.
first off, im watching an award show for REAL PEOPLE...the entire
"animated short" category is just a throwaway, a bathroom break during
the show, so in essence, a commercial. it would be a little more
tolerable if it were actual real humans presenting an award for obscure
animations that no one ever saw...but getting chicken little and his
duck bitch to present the award? fuck you disney and academy. second
off, ben stiller is hilarious...but not for special effects. that
entire skit was just horrible. i could almost hear russell crowe
getting closer to insanity and reenacting his phone beating act. third
off...brokeback mountain.
moving on.
chronicles of narnia...fuck you. wasnt that supposed to be like some
christian cult classic epic, like the passion...and so far all its won
is makeup, which no one gives a shit about. i also hate these obscure
people, the people you dont even know exist but they make the movie
what it is...i think they are great, and i appreciate their work, but
jesus, youre no real celebrity, dont drag your speech on, because trust
me, NO ONE CARES. they try to be funny...IM NOT LAUGHING. plus, as much
as i think jon stewart was a great idea for host, wasnt there a time
when that was billy crystals forte? now that hes not hosting the
oscars, hes gotta have like no work. thats the jewish curse, we already
have great jobs, but we wont rest until we take someone elses. jesus,
he did it like all through the 90's and was going to host it this year,
but turned down the opportunity so he could work on his one-man show.
so lets see, billy crystal turned down the chance to host the academy
awards again, one of the most prestigious award ceremonies, so he could
work on some insignificant one-man show. senilitys taking its toll. on
another note, i thought dolly parton was dead, but then i saw her up
there, incredibly huge tits and all. march of the penguins? with the
bringing up plush penguins for their acceptance and then whistling and
saying it means "thank you in penguin?" tyler gave color commentary on
this:
nobreathing734: oh my god
nobreathing734: youve gotta be shitting me
BeethovenTheTree: Fuckers
nobreathing734: those fucking fags
BeethovenTheTree: Fucking Swiss bastards
as soon as i find out the best actor/actress, ill have something to say about them.
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| HEY GUESS WHAT.
theres a rant you cant see.
between this announcement and the rant on wriggles down there.
wanna see it?
tough shit.
comment here and ill show it to you...not for the easily offended, so if you are, then FUCK YOU.
| | |
| next rant...i know ive already done this person, but god dammit, she deserves another rant.
my next victim, you guessed it...wriggles.
only 3 days into the second semester, i am strongly reminded of why i
hate this woman so much. first off, nick and allison did the smart
thing and got the hell out of there, and i would have joined them, but
that would mean possibly dropping down to an honors level class. i have
been in gifted language arts ever since i moved here, it has always
been my class that the level (regular, honors, gifted, ap) has not
changed, and ill be damned if im going to let one racist bitch, no
matter how much i hate her, force me to change the one class that has
been the constant in my education in georgia. anyway, since nick was in
it, it was all right because we would always laugh at what a bitch she
is. now, hes a lucky bastard and doesnt have her anymore. i mean, dont
get me wrong, theres still jenny who hates her more than i do, so thats
fine, and tyler, even though were not in the same period, he knows how
i feel too. second off, i know its high school and we work hard, but
god dammit, i had two big assignments this week and they were both in
that class, the fucking wordmasters flashcards and challenge that i
despise, and now some essay that, if we fail now, will screw us for the
whole semester, and shes making us do a rough draft and prewrite, both
of which i find completely pointless. now i understand that there are
two groups of people in this situation: people who need to do a rough
draft so they can make edits, or people, like myself, who would rather
go straight to the final draft and just make it as perfect as possible
there. in that case, i would think wriggles would understand that too,
but the bitch just doesnt. third off, shes pretending to be nice to all
of us by saying that well all be rich and famous someday and she hopes
that well mention her when we appear on the tonight show with jay leno.
theres a couple of things wrong with that. first, if i appear on the
tonight show with jay fucking leno, i consider my career over. second,
there is no way in hell ill mention her anywhere, on any show, unless
the host asks me what teacher in school i consider to have been the
worst influence on my life. anyway, its time to wrap this baby up,
gotta save some for the next rant on her (trust me, until 9th grade
ends, expect a few more). so, wriggles, once again you get the Double
Retard In A Box award (if you dont remember, its a better award then
the Incredibly Retarded Dickhead award in that it means you are so
fucking assholish that this award does not just stand for the time im
pissed at you, it stands until i no longer have to deal with you.).
congratulations, and remember that jesus loves you, but the rest of us
think youre a fucking bitch.
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| Nick's back
side note- if you read somthing that offends you, chill the fuck out, it's just a joke, you don't need to freak out and call the dali lama to karate chop jesus, onto what i speak
today's rant- those damn little icon things everyone puts on their xangas
WHO THE HELL COMES UP WITH THESE THINGS!??!?!?!?! i mean there must be a more productive use of your time, like knitting, or stalking famous people in an attempt to find an apple peal or a shoelace that they touched and sell it on ebay to some 47 years old who lives with his mom and plays with barbie dolls at least 7 hours a day. but no, some idiot thought "i wonder how i can piss people off with little squares that might move or say somthing that some people think is clever... I KNOW, the way i just said." but don't get me wrong, there are some hilarious one's, the one with the pikachu's beating the crap out of each other, classic, one where is says "i'm catholic, you're catholic, let's beat up a hindu," pedantic yet cozy. but these rare kodak pieces of hell are not enough to excuse the fact that the world need to stop playing with these squares of dismentalitly, and get back to making fun of cripples and blind penquins. that's why xanga icons get today's Go Suck A Railroad Spike Award, i hope you burn in Neverland | | |
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so this is caety, and I'm on perry's rant xanga, just because I'm amazing like that. just kidding. but, uh, seriously though.
ICONS HERE DELETED DUE TO EXTREME RETARDATION. KTHX. -perry
So why am I on Perry's rant xanga, you ask? Well it's because of this kid I know named Tyler.
See, for the first few weeks of this school year I couldn't help but
notice that in two of my classes (4 biology and 5 theater) there
was an attractive boy who stood out from everyone else I had classes
with. So, over the first 6 weeks, I got to know him and found him to
actually be a pretty cool kid... we shared views on a lot of subjects,
he was funny, I assumed he was smart being that he was in my biology
class and all, so eventually I convinced him to sit at my lunch table.
Around that time I learned that he was going out with Prosper (who
through him I have become friends with), but I figured "whatever". It
wasn't until about the second midterm that I got over my "new meat"
crush on Tyler. and it wasn't because of prosper.
ICONS HERE DELETED DUE TO EXTREME RETARDATION. KTHX. -perry
It turns out that Tyler is an egotistic, racist ass hole. and that's putting it lightly. once Tyler started sitting at my lunch table he became quick friends with perry. this made me happy considering Tyler
didn't have many friends at brookwood and perry needed more and
I liked them both so much (just perry not in the same way as Tyler)
and that it'd be great fun! right? wrong. perry created an "opening up"
of Tyler, in that Tyler came out of his appealing self and started,
well, being like perry. I'm not at all saying that's a bad thing, don't
get me wrong. perry's personality works for him. and him alone.
 this icon can stay. otherwise, ICONS HERE DELETED DUE TO EXTREME RETARDATION. KTHX. -perry
However, there became more and more noticeable differences between perry's personality and Tyler's as time progressed. While perry understands what's funny and what's not, Tyler
kind of doesn't. a good example would be of a picture that Thomas made
of me probably two years ago... it's, well, not the least bit
flattering. perry of course finds it hilarious and teases me about it,
but I understand that's how perry is and that he wouldn't take it any
farther. Tyler on the
other hand found it to be "blackmail" material and has come very close
to spreading it around the school and has admitted to doing so. I don't
know about you, but uh, that seems a little far, don't you think?
ICONS HERE DELETED DUE TO EXTREME RETARDATION. KTHX. -perry
Another difference I noticed between my adorable perry and this monster who was coming out of Tyler was the racism. while perry maybe cracks one joke that could be considered racist, Tyler
soon started blooming with them. it got the the point where every day
Tyler would have something more and more racist to say, which
understandably got pretty damn old. what's more, he was extremely
callous about it to the point where most of the black kids in our
school were ready to lynch him. smart? not at all.
ICONS HERE DELETED DUE TO EXTREME RETARDATION. KTHX. -perry
Along with this racism, Tyler
became more and more prone to attacking religions, something perry has
never done. I'm not a racist person at all, so of course it bothered me
about Tyler that he could
sit there every day and have something crude to say about general
people, but I wasn't wanting to start anything so I let it go by. but
when you start messing with religions and you don't make any good
points, I'm going to get a bit upset. ever since I was little I've
taken an interest in religion- I've always been fascinated by the human
need for guidance and hope. so for someone with little education and
real interest in the subject to come along and try and "disown" major
religions like Christianity kind of hit me hard in the chest. Don’t get
me wrong, it’s not as if I disrespect anyone who tries to push the
envelope. The thing that upset me about the situation was that Tyler
did it purely to see how many people he could piss off, as if it was a
way of proving himself to society. Even more, he had to go and take it
so far as to create extremely rude depictions of Jesus. not once do I
recall Tyler actually making a good point about why he was doing this,
other than trying to piss people off. Everyone has their right to an
opinion, but it doesn't mean you have to try and force it down people's
throats. Tyler, I don’t
think you understand that religion is non debatable. People have been
trying for thousands of years to prove that they ’re right regarding
the subject, and it’s never worked. There’s no point in bringing it up…
you ’re not going to win. actually, there's nothing for you to win,
except my Incomparable Fucktard Trophy. Congratulations, and get a
better life. oh, and a new lunch table. kthnx.
ICONS HERE DELETED DUE TO EXTREME RETARDATION. KTHX. -perry
-Caety
ICONS HERE DELETED DUE TO EXTREME RETARDATION. KTHX. -perry
Tyler,
if you grow up I'll stop bitching at you. let's kiss and make up. well
maybe not kiss, I hear you don't brush your teeth.....
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